Amazing Grace

The video below was a wedding present I made for William back in December. I wanted to share it with those following this blog, for if you're still with us you have become a part of our story. I created the video hoping to capture a glimpse of what I feel. For you see our story did not start the night Will had a life threatening stroke in which he was found around 13 hours later unconscious in bed. Our story started years before that. For me it started when I was 14 and attended a youth dance, in which no one asked me to dance. I cried for hours afterwords. I worried I wasn't good enough or pretty enough, that I could not be loved. My greatest desire in life has always been to have a family of my own. A good family.

As I entered my early twenties, many of my close friends were joining hands and hearts with their future companions, however my hope was not realized and again my heart broke. Meanwhile, Will was facing challenges of his own. Will's sister found Will one night in tears feeling that he would not be able to afford medical school or get into the school he wanted. Those fears became a reality when he was not accepted to U of U's medical school that year. Will's dream of becoming a doctor was taken from him (for a time). It was around this point I met Will. We quickly became friends but nothing more as Will was working toward being accepted to other medical schools. I remember being disappointed when I heard he would be moving to Ohio - I sent him with a "travel care package" and wished him luck thinking the next time I would hear from him is when he needed my address to send me his wedding invitation. Gratefully, however, this was not his next contact. We dated on and off through these years and then talked about joining hearts and hands-- when the time to decide came we again shed tears, as a long distant relationship was not in the plans. Will returned to Ohio. We picked up the pieces of our lives and moved on.

It wasn't over night that I was able to rise above the fears of the present moments and muster the courage to start my own career and buy a home of my own, but in the Lord's amazing grace-- he brought me peace every time I fell. He did the same for Will who was required to balance a demanding medical school schedule with teaching/serving more than 100 members in his church calling as Elder's Quorum President. He lifted Will and I and made it possible for us to have what I now call "compensating blessings." The images you'll see in the video reflect the years Will and I spent "alone" trying to create a life that would be acceptable before our Heavenly Father. However, we were rarely alone as you can see the people in video are and continue to be our amazing grace. Our parents, our brothers, our sisters, our nieces, our nephews and our friends carried us through times we felt we could go no further.

Since returning home from Ohio to recover from his stroke, Will and I have spent little time apart for the Lord mended what was broken. And while over the past year we have stood and continue to stand at the crossroads of losing "our dream" of Will becoming a doctor and my becoming the mother of a wonderful family, the Lord has promised good to us. With God's unending love we'll make it. For in this is God's Amazing Grace - "how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me..."